Today is the end of two days full of music. It's a good kind of tired. One I wouldn't mind having for the rest of my living days. Of course, throw in some sleep and down time in there and I'll be just fine.
I have one more page in my journal left and I thought "hmm there are so many directions it could go." I usually don't think about what I put in my journal, I just write. However, I do give thought to the very first and last pages. I believe the starting and ending have some merit. I'm sure it's purely psychological but that's what I think.
I don't like change. I don't like letting go. Yet, when someone was telling me that they have a new idea and are changing things around in their student organization. I replied, well if it works or does not work, there is change and change is always good. He nodded in agreement. (thoughts: uhmmm change for you not for me...).
So change is good right? (thoughts: ugh)
You are getting my attention tonight rather than the last pages of my little journal. I'm not quite ready to finish it off. I'm not sure what I will say. It's like a date with someone special or something. I want the words to be quite telling of how I feel yet I want to be hopeful simultaneously. Is it so impossible? My head is too tired at this moment to even bridge that gap.
A dear friend of mine reminded me today, be thoughtful and respect wherever you are at in life but leave room for the possibility of change. You never know. (thoughts: change, scary, change, no way, change, really?, change, scary).
Well, my last page will be filled nevertheless. (thoughts: it will be ok...just another thing about growing up. change. breathe. change.)
Love,
C
PS picture taken at Wichita Mountains
No comments:
Post a Comment